Toys: How much is too much?
With the holiday festivities in full swing as we inch closer to Hanukkah and Christmas, the season for giving is ramping up. Toys for the kids, a new sweater for your husband to replace the one with a hole in it, or the perfect bar of soap and candle for Grandma—finding the right gift can be stressful. Balancing personal preferences, budgets, and the hope of finding something meaningful often turns gift-giving into a daunting task. Add in the pressure of keeping things equitable among family members, and the holiday spirit can quickly feel overwhelming. Did you meet the budget? Did Sally get more gifts than Johnny? So many questions arise, hurdles to leap over, and hoops to jump through when it comes to holiday giving.
Well, the good news is, Mondy’s Mission is here with some advice and a piece of good news: less is more!
Society loves to tell us that we need ALL the toys for our children. Advertisements, social media influencers, and even peer pressure can make parents feel like they must provide an endless supply of toys to ensure their child’s happiness and success. However, what the salespeople at Tonka, Hasbro, and Barbie don’t understand is that too many toys can actually hinder our children's development. Let’s dive into what is truly valuable for a child when it comes to toys and the role they play in their development.
Quantity
As a home care speech pathologist with almost a decade of experience under my belt, you can imagine how many homes I’ve visited. One common sight I often encounter is a playroom covered in toys, bookshelves filled with shape sorters and action figures, toy chests overflowing with train tracks, and suitcases stuffed with dolls just looking to escape for some air. Having this many toys available to a child creates three clear challenges for the development of speech and language:
Difficulty Developing Attention Skills: When a child has access to an abundance of toys all at once from a young age, what often happens is activity hopping. Children will play with a toy, but before completing the activity or accomplishing a task, they find a new toy that may be less challenging or more exciting and immediately move on. This cycle continues until the child is distracted by something else or finds a simple toy that does not challenge them and keeps them content.
Problem-Solving Challenges: As mentioned above, when children have access to too many toys, they will rarely choose to challenge themselves and complete a difficult task if they cannot succeed within the first few seconds of trying. This can lead to more frequent tantrums and less patience when asked to complete activities or follow directions later on.
Lack of Ownership or Responsibility: While it may seem silly to attribute accountability and responsibility to a child as young as one or two years old, these skills are learned from the very beginning. One of the daycares I visit has a sign that reads, “Play is the work of children.” I completely agree with this sentiment. No, we don’t expect a three-year-old to walk the dog or mow the lawn. However, playing with their toys appropriately and cleaning them up is something we should expect.
This may be a hot take, but here it is: children only need six toys. I know, I know… it sounds extreme, but it’s true. Children only know what we present to them. If they have only a few toys, they will play with those because it’s what’s available. Research has shown that limiting the number of toys can encourage deeper play and improve attention spans. For example, a study published in the journal Infant Behavior and Development found that toddlers engaged in more creative and focused play when given fewer toys at a time. Don’t let advertisements or influencers guilt you into buying more for your child than they actually need.
Quality
Now that we’ve established that too many toys can be counterproductive, let’s discuss what types of quality toys are worth having. When selecting toys, I keep two key questions in mind:
Is it developmentally appropriate? I like to consider my child’s current age and think about where they are developmentally as well as what will be appropriate for the next three months. Identifying these milestones is easier than you think. Mondy’s Mission offers speech and language milestones for children from birth to seven years old for free on our website. Visit www.mondysmission.com/resources to explore these milestones and learn how to support your child’s development. With this information, you can make informed decisions about toys that will help your child develop and improve their speech and language skills.
Does this toy create language opportunities? Imagine playing with your child using a toy. What kind of language are you using? Are you labeling objects? Are you introducing action words? Are you discussing colors, sizes, and shapes? These questions will vary depending on your child’s age, but the key is ensuring you’re incorporating core vocabulary. These are the "meat and potatoes" of language: words like stop, go, make, put, give, and help. If the toy supports this kind of interaction, you’re on the right track.
Tip: Store your child’s toys in clear plastic bins with lids or locks. This approach encourages interaction by prompting your child to communicate their needs, such as making a request to access the toys. It also helps them focus on just one or two toys at a time, enhancing their ability to concentrate and fostering better organization skills. This encourages your child to make a request to access the toys, giving them access to only one or two at a time. This method improves attention skills, and you can have your child clean up before accessing a new bin.
It may seem counterintuitive to decrease the number of toys your child has in order to increase their speech and language skills, but with regular toy rotation and careful selection of the right toys, your child will have every opportunity to expand their developmental and language skills. By focusing on quality over quantity, you’re not just reducing clutter—you’re creating a richer, more meaningful play experience for your child.
This holiday season, embrace the idea that less truly is more. Fewer, thoughtfully chosen toys can spark more creativity, encourage deeper connections, and bring lasting joy to your family. After all, the best gifts we can give our children are our time, love, and the tools to help them grow.
